Grandma’s China
It’s the hot topic among end of life workers, decluttering experts and minimalists these days. The china. And it seems universal: no one wants it.
As the older generations are downsizing, moving into smaller homes, condos or assisted living situations, they’re faced with the impossible task of offloading heirlooms that no one wants. There’s such little demand and high supply you can’t GIVE this stuff away. People aren’t hosting the fancy dinners as often and no one has the china hutch with the dishes we only use on special occasions, nor the china within. Heck about a decade back mom even stopped using the china at Thanksgiving because handwashing all that stuff was a nightmare. We went to paper plates.
When my parents downsized to a condo a couple years back, they sold off the dining room set and were baffled that it was basically worthless and they made practically no money on that sale. I tried my best to explain but their generation has a very different view on belongings than we do.
But back to the china.
I was in the same camp. I told mom I had zero interest in any of it. I’m a proud minimalist, and don’t hold attachment to physical items. She knew this. But she just did not have the heart to get rid of it. Guys….she had THREE SETS OF CHINA. Her mom’s, her great aunt’s and hers/dad’s from their wedding. She was able to offload her great aunt’s to one of her nephews, but this left the other two. (My niece expressed mild interest in hers/dad’s.) “I know it’s stupid for this to sit in boxes in the basement but I just can’t. When I’m gone, do whatever you want with it.”
Then she was gone.
I had a half a mind to take it all home and just rage smash it all in the street while deep in my grief. I wanted to shatter those dishes like her death shattered my heart. Instead….I brought it home.
I took each piece out of the boxes, all carefully wrapped by mom’s loving hands and laid them all out. This was clearly more than one set. 12 tiny little cups, 15 tiny saucers, 13 dinner plates….finger bowls? sigh Odd numbers and so many different sizes of plates, and who in god’s name uses a gravy boat anymore?
Screw it.
I took the boxes and bubble wrap and wrapped up my everyday Corningware and posted it on Facebook and set all of grandma’s china in my cabinets. (Save for half the plates that are back in a box in MY basement because OHMYGODSOMANYPLATES) I’m using the tiny little cups for my coffee in the morning, I’m using the fancy plates for my afternoon snackies, I’m using the dinner plates for….well…dinner. (Although I’m not entirely sure what to use the finger bowls for.) And I’m chucking the lot into the damn dishwasher. If they break, they break. (God knows I have enough plates for 3 lifetimes. SERIOUSLY WHY SO MANY PLATES?!?!) Life’s too short for handwashing dishes and why not be fancy with my morning coffee?
I use the fancy crystal glassware I was gifted for my first wedding for everyday drinks, and I put those in the dishwasher too. I have no children to burden with these items so why not use them now and enjoy them?
And when I plow through a plate of salt and vinegar chips or cheez-its, I can think about my grandmother. And all the Thanksgiving dinners we ate on those plates. All the laughter, dad’s blessings over hearty feasts, drunk ex husbands ruining an evening, off color jokes from the uncle. Those large holidays have dimmed to small gatherings on paper plates, but my solo dinners of reheated hamburger helper can feel a little more fancy now.
(My actual snack of a Zebra cake and BBQ chips while writing this blog)
